Lesbian Family Building: Pregnancy Options for Same-Sex Female Couples
While same-sex female couples face unique circumstances in the journey to parenthood, there are now more options than ever for lesbian couple family building with the support of fertility treatment.
The fertility treatment process begins with discussing your goals with your physician. Lesbian family building looks different for everyone, and your treatment will be tailored to your unique needs.
Treatments for Lesbian Couple Family Building
Invitro Fertilization (IVF)
IVF in lesbian family building involves taking the egg from one partner and combining it with donor sperm to create an embryo in the lab. The embryo is then placed in the uterus of the partner who will be carrying the pregnancy.
IVF is an option for anyone who has experienced infertility issues or who is a candidate because of health, age, or genetic issues, or who has been determined to be a candidate through fertility testing.
A practice called reciprocal IVF can be an incredible option for lesbian family building because it includes the direct participation of both partners. Reciprocal IVF involves combining one partner’s egg with donor sperm and placing the embryo in the other partner’s uterus. Many couples appreciate this process because it creates a close bonding experience with the baby for all involved.
Intrauterine Insemination (IUI)
- IUI involves inserting washed, concentrated donor sperm directly into the uterus with a catheter during ovulation. If your physician determines through fertility testing that you are a candidate for IUI, it's a great, less invasive option.
- IUI is not an option for reciprocal IVF since it can only be done with the eggs belonging to the person who will carry the baby. Many couples who qualify opt for this treatment and appreciate the lower cost and time it can take to go through the process.
Egg Freezing
- Egg freezing involves retrieving then cryopreserving your eggs to be used for IVF in the future. Individuals with ovaries freeze their eggs for a multitude of reasons including delaying family building for their own timeline, health reasons, and preserving eggs while their partner carries the first child. In lesbian family building, one or both partners may choose to freeze their eggs for use in future IVF or reciprocal IVF treatments.
Donors and Gestational Carriers for Lesbian Family Building
When both partners have ovaries it’s necessary to use donor sperm, and there are many options for finding the right donor. Couples may also utilize donor eggs or a gestational carrier depending on their needs and their physician’s recommendation.
- Donor sperm can be used in both IVF and IUI. Today there are upwards of 60,000 babies conceived every year with donated sperm. This service is commonly utilized by everyone from those with fertility issues, to single women, and LQBTQ+ couples.
There are two categories of sperm donors: unidentified donors and known donors.
- Unidentified donors are sourced through a sperm band. Reputable sperm banks require extensive donor screening and sperm testing to ensure it meets the necessary requirements before it becomes available. Typically, working a donor bank means that the donor will not be involved in the process at any point and will remain anonymous. One potential drawback is that if you are hoping to have multiple pregnancies with the same donor their sperm may not always be available in the future. However, if you find a sperm donor that’s a match their sperm is usually available immediately based on your treatment timeline.
- Known donors are typically a friend or family member of the couple that they might select so that the baby has DNA from both mothers or because the DNA is coming from a trusted friend. This process can take longer because a known donor has to undergo medical, social, and psychological testing before they can be approved to donate sperm. This type of sperm donation is, however, more affordable since the donor in this situation usually does not charge the couple for the sperm.
Donor Eggs
- Donor eggs are retrieved from a donor and are either frozen or transferred fresh into the recipient’s uterus via IVF. People use donor eggs for a number of reasons including fertility issues, lack of eggs or poor quality/count of eggs, or for same sex couples.
- Couples may opt for donor eggs in lesbian family building because both partners are experiencing fertility issues or because the partners wish to work exclusively with one egg donor and potentially also one sperm donor so that the children are half or full siblings.
- Working with an egg donor can be a bit more extensive of a process than working with just a sperm donor. This depends on whether you decide to use fresh or frozen eggs. With fresh eggs the donor will go through the egg retrieval process after you match with them. With frozen eggs they will have already undergone the treatment, and the eggs will be thawed for you to use them. Fresh eggs can have a slightly higher success rate since there is no risk of damage during the thawing process, but frozen eggs allow for more flexibility since they are available immediately based on your cycle.
Gestational Carriers
- A gestational carrier, or surrogate, undergoes IVF with your embryo and carries the baby to term for a couple or individual that can’t carry a pregnancy or electively decides not to.
- This service is sometimes utilized in lesbian couple family building if neither of the partners are able to carry the pregnancy due to health, genetics, or age. Or, if both partners decide they would like a third party to carry the child for any reason.
- Matching with the right gestational carrier through an agency can be an extensive process but once you do you will typically be in close contact with them throughout the entire pregnancy and birth.
Your Path to Parenthood
Discovering the path to lesbian family building that works best for you starts with working with a trusted medical professional who respects and understands your unique needs as a same-sex couple. Book a consultation with Spring Fertility today to learn more about how you can benefit from fertility treatment.